By the Pricking of My Thumbs, Something Wicked This Way Comes

I have an exciting story! I meant to post it much sooner, but I didn't have the chance.

Anyway, I was sitting around minding my own business when my mother requested I venture to the mall to purchase a certain skin care product for her (Clarins, I believe?). So, I took the keys, got into her automobile, and went on my merry way. When I arrived at Macy's (and parked perfectly), I walked in and was bombarded by those perfume ladies who want you to buy all of their different fragrances. When I finally got to the Clarins counter, the young lady (not much older than myself) was very unhelpful and I walked out of the mall empty handed (though I made sure to grab a tall white chocolate peppermint mocha frappachino with a cream base from Starbucks before I left). As I was sitting on 211 waiting for the red light to turn green, the man in the lane to the right of me (due to incredible impatience) decided to go right through the stop light. Just after this horrific display of a total disregard for the law, the inattentive woman behind me crashed into the back of my vehicle. I was horrified that such a tragedy could have occurred, especially since it was the first time I was driving my mom's car. By and by, I hastily went through the light as soon as it turned green, fleeting from the unobservant woman (who for all I knew may have been a psychopath who gains pleasure from crashing into people). She continued to follow me and honk her horn until I gave up and pulled into the local Jiffy Lube. She told me of her remorse for hitting me and her joy that I was unharmed. Since I was uninsured, I thought it to be in my best interest to not report the accident. After all, my car was unharmed even though hers was damaged. My mom wasn't happy about what had happened, but I'm sure she'll soon get over it.

Anyway, I hope you all appreciate the tone I used for this post. It was fun to write.

Morals learned:

1) Expect the unexpected
2) Don't drive if you are uninsured
3) Get $ from the person that rear-ends you